Thursday, August 30, 2012

The choice of marriage

Marriages are made in heaven. We earthlings just choose whether we like it arranged or with a lot of love sprinkled in.

The debate between love and arranged marriage is a never ending one. With either side presenting points to prove their one-upmanship, it represents a perfect see-saw. In my opinion the choice of marriage is more got to do with preference rather than which is right. With no one able to say which is a full proof wedlock for happy times ahead it adds to the confusion. And yes, with the world to please regarding your decision it’s easily said than done.

For me, marriage is the coming together of various things. Love – the cement that holds people together, understanding – not needing words to explain yourself, trust – the unshakable pillar and compatibility – matching the right wavelength. But in order to reach all this and make the ultimate life changing decision of marriage one requires time. After all marriage doesn't come with an undo option and in a country like India divorce is still a taboo.

In our fast paced lives where noodles is preferred over biryani giving time and getting to know someone well is a difficult task. Now some might say let’s go with the easy thing of letting our parents bear the headache of choosing a partner for us. The best part of this arrangement is that we get the most important certificate of approval from the ones we want it the most (in one way or the other. After all a wedding snap without your parents in it no matter how grand doesn't look good). The bad side of this arrangement is since the partner is not your choice and you hardly know him/her married life becomes more of a discovery rather than a journey together. Also it’s more of an acceptance of the other resulting in a compromise.

In love marriage you know the person inside out (that's if it is done well). It’s your choice and your decision. Hence as long as the two people in love are convinced that they two are the ones for each other nothing can and should keep them apart. Where convincing your parents is concerned that's a tough thing, but with proper convincing and the basic understanding of the fact that the happiness of the parents lie in the happiness of their children, I guess such a thing can be sorted.  

If you’re thinking I must be married to know all this then NO. If you want to know what my choice would be then it’s a no brainer – Love marriage. I would prefer however bad my marriage is to be the result of my decision rather than someone else’sJ. To know more about this whole entire marriage fiasco you may visit

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