Discomfort

Have you ever lost it completely? Where you do not remember what you said, what you wore, who all were there around you? What all you did?..I can bet most of us have been through a situation like that sometime in our lives. However, the key thought process after reading the above sentence, most of us will genuinely agree would be about a negative experience that we have had in our life, yet there will be a percentage of people who will differ otherwise.

Have you ever loved someone so much that, as if you felt you are smothering the person and yet are unable to do an iota of nothing? Or perused a dream so intensely that you can almost feel living it in reality? These are some high intensity feeling generated in ourselves that make us completely powerless of our very existence for a while or sometimes for moments. The intensity is so high that the body actually becomes a live volcano. With the word ‘Volcano’ used here, most of us will associate it with destruction and death and many negatives, yet sublimely we all know, how earth and all its various magnificent mountains above sea and below sea have formed on earth.

My reference to the word ‘Volcano’ above has a significance of an experience I have had recently. And like the high flames and volumes of molten lava coming out through it, I experienced the same episode on a very personal note. The unfathomable destruction caused, will be felt for a long time. Yet it was a beginning of something new too, dropping the FEAR of abandonment and voicing something that had been bothering inside the heart for far too long it could withhold.

Power display is actually an amazing emotion to watch, specially, men versus women and vice-versa. The music that play in the background has an utmost serenity to be observed; but ‘Only from a distance’. I have experienced recently the sharp pain of becoming the most hated person in a person’s life and have received adjectives that I will prefer never been spoken. Taking a few steps down, I realized it was simmering for a while and the warning signals were displayed several times, yet though they were not really overlooked, but both parties chose to ignore them and continue life as usual.

The experience has made a few learning’s clear to me like bright morning sunlight which I always knew but maybe did not put so much emphasis before; integrity in our acts, honestly in our thoughts and being faithful in our heart is imperative to anything that we do in life. Degrading anyone of these aspects will eventually lead to an eruption of another volcano.

The heart and soul aches to see the bloodshed, if only I had the power to heal and take away all the pain and anger..within myself and then maybe someone else too…